Leadership Is a Mirror: Why Your Standards Set the Culture

Nic Fren
Jul 30
3 min read

Shane Kempton | CEO For Harcourts Western Australia — **Shane Kempton |** **CEO For Harcourts Western Australia**

You don’t build culture with a values poster on the wall. You build it with the example you set when you think no one’s watching.

As a leader, whether you're a business owner, office principal, BDM, or senior agent, one of the hardest truths to accept is this: “Your team doesn’t rise to your words. They rise or fall to your example.”

That’s not always comfortable to hear. But it’s the mirror every leader eventually faces. Because the truth is: you are the culture. Not the mission statement. Not the team chant. You.

How you show up…

How you prepare…

How you speak behind closed doors…

How you regulate your emotions during chaos…

That becomes the baseline your team calibrates to.

Culture Isn’t What You Say - It’s What You Model

Early in my leadership career, I fell into the trap of blaming external forces for underperformance.

The market was slow.
The team lacked drive.
The brand wasn’t competitive enough.

But over time, through wise mentors and hard-earned feedback, I learned a confronting truth: If you don’t like what you’re getting, check what you’re giving.

That was a game-changer. Leadership wasn’t about fixing others;it started with holding myself to a higher standard.

And once I shifted from “giving orders” to “setting the standard,” everything changed. The team lifted, not out of fear, but respect.

Five Mirror Questions for Every Leader

Want to know how aligned your leadership is right now? Ask yourself:

Would I follow me today?
Where am I letting myself off the hook?
What behaviours am I tolerating that clash with my values?
Where’s the gap between what I say and what I do?
What’s one standard I need to raise again, starting with me?

You don’t have to be perfect. But you do have to be congruent.

My Own Mirror Moment

There was a time I was pushing my team hard to hit monthly KPIs, chasing number one status, pumping up performance, demanding more focus.

But quietly… I wasn’t walking my talk.

I was late to meetings.
I was prepping at the last minute.
I was missing one-on-ones.
My energy was scattered, reactive.

One of my senior leaders pulled me aside and said: “Shane, we follow your lead. If you’re scattered, we get anxious. If you’re focused, we lock in.”

It hit hard. But they were right.

So, I recalibrated. I rebuilt my routine. I tightened my habits. And no surprise, the team shifted too.

Culture doesn’t change with slogans. It changes when the leader models what matters.

Culture Is Built Behind Closed Doors

The strongest real estate cultures aren’t built in big moments. They’re built in repetition:

How you prepare for a team meeting
How you handle tension or conflict
How you speak about people when they’re not in the room
How you respond when no one’s watching

Your presence is your performance.

And in this industry, energy is contagious. Whether it’s clarity or chaos, your team catches your state like a cold.

The Real Job Title: Chief Energy Officer

Yes, you're a CEO, Director, or Principal. But more than that, you’re the Chief Energy Officer of your team.

Ask yourself before you enter the room:

What tone do I want to set?
What emotion do I want to transfer?
Who do I need to be right now?

Because leadership starts with presence. And presence starts with intention.

Final Word: Own It Before You Lead It

Whatever standard you want your team to live by, ownership, punctuality, preparation, service - you must live it first.

Not loudly. Just consistently.

And when you do, something powerful happens.

Your team lifts, not because they have to, but because they don’t want to let you down. That’s not fear. That’s influence.

That’s how leaders scale trust.

That’s how culture compounds.

That’s how performance becomes personal.

Action Drill - For Leaders in the Arena

Standard Self-Scan:

List five behaviours you expect from your team. Now ask: Do I model them daily?
Raise One Standard:

Choose an area where you’ve slipped and recommit to it this week. No announcement. Just action.
Share the Mirror Message:

At your next meeting, share the principle: “Leadership is a mirror.” Invite your team to reflect and align.